Sweet Enola Gay! Minutes ago I was just standing outside of the redundantly-named Nina's Coffee Cafe smoking a cigarette when some young blond woman, a complete stranger, comes up to me and says:
"Excuse me, are you in Chasing Windmills?"
I wish I would have had a photograph of my face upon hearing that. In spite of my earlier joking, this is something that I never dreamed would really happen.
"Yes."
"And you played a stalker?"
"Yes."
"How did you ever get the part?"
Now here is where I fucked up. I could have launched into some wildly improbable story that ended with,
"So would you like a part in Chasing Windmills? I bet I can get you one. C'mon, let's go talk about it over a beer...."
This of course is the subject of an earlier post. The point is, ingrate that I am, I spat in the face of the golden once-in-a-lifetime opportunity that Fate had handed me and instead told her the real story (that I blackmailed Cristina with the threat of posting photos of her when she was in her Robert Smith phase). When will I ever learn?
I suppose it's too much to hope that this chance will ever come again. But just in case, the rest of the afternoon I'll be muttering suitable lines to myself, trying them out to see how they sound and then packing them away in my brain in a small section that says "Break Glass If Recognized From Chasing Windmills By Strange Woman" and that has a little hammer hanging on a chain next to it.
-- Hulles
12 comments:
You slay me.
You need some business cards with pithy lines printed on them for moments such as these.
Always a blond...
Heather, what a great idea! Too bad I didn't opt for Ladonian nobility; if I had they could say "Baron Hulles" and be embossed and impressive. I think I'll have to add that to the list of things I won't get around to, which if you recall is how you established I was your dad in the first place. Not sure where this is going but I hope you had a great birthday and hugs to you.
Jen, if I could have designed her ahead of time she would have looked like Kate Beckinsale (not blond) and not said anything at all, just planted a lip lock on me.
I played the hand I was dealt, what can I say.
And here I thought you were going to say she'd look just like me. ;)
How awesome! It's always weird when someone recognizes you from an art gig, but always super cool. Actually, I think the real story was probably just as interesting as any fiction you could have made up on the spot. 'Course now you've got time to practice...
Awesome. Next step for you is getting attacked by wild fan girls. Lucky for you this step involves several liplocks all at once while Joe Francis hovers in the background with a video camera yelling for the girls to get their damn hair and clothes out of the shot.
Jen, you mean you don't think you look like Kate Beckinsale?
Angie, yeah, I was laughing about the incident all day. I've written before about being in Cristina's company when people recognized her, who knew? And the practice is going fine. Next time....
T., I'm so okay with several liplocks all at once. Wild fan grrrrrls? Dang, I should have blackmailed Cristina for the part a long time ago.
Too funny.
(And thanks for not posting those Robert Smith-look-alike photos. I cringe just to think of it.)
Let's see...straight brown hair (nope), blue eyes (nope), little button nose (definitely nope). I think I could go on for days. So, no, I don't think I look anything like Kate Beckinsale.
Cristina, I think it's hilarious. And you were adorable in your Cure phase. Much much cuter than I was in my Mothers of Invention phase, trust me. XO.
Jen, just kidding. I think you look just fine the way you are (at least in wedding pictures and CW videos). And your cleavage is better than Kate's, pretty sure. And neither one of you is blond, which was the original point I think. Maybe. Anyway, hugs to you! (And get well soon if you're not already.)
i love heather's idea of business cards. :D that's so cool that you were you were spotted, hulles.
i actually went through a robert smith phase myself. :O and last i noticed robert smith was still in a robert smith phase.
Anne, I agree with the business cards idea. In fact, a couple months ago I actually made some that I call "bar cards" (as opposed to "business cards"). They just say "Consulting Iconoclast" on them and have my email and blog address on them.
I should probably jazz them up with pithy sayings as Heather says. In fact as I think of it maybe I'll include a still from a CW episode as a creepy picture. I think I can enhance the crotchtal area with PhotoShop or something.
And you're right. I went to the official Robert Smith web site to make sure I got the story right and that I wasn't confusing his name with that of an American Vice President in 1858 or something, like I seem to have been doing lately. And it would appear that he is still in a Robert Smith phase.
I bet you were adorable in your Robert Smith phase just like Cristina. Goth like so rules.
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